Night Terrors

This is a pre-workshopped version. I will post my revised version soon.

My truth is warped, twisted,
Staring me in the face each night,
Banging incessantly in the prison of my mind,
Where it is locked away.

The words shake the iron bars
Trying to escape,
And suddenly the prison collapses.

Words come flowing,
Filling the recesses of my brain,
Saturating my mind,
They will not stop.

Flowing, flowing, flowing,
They are brilliant,
But too soon are lost,
Escaped through every orifice,
Permanently lost in the silent air.

They are like vomit,
Projecting out in front of me,
Slimy and unorganized,
I do not want to touch them
But I am mesmerized.

Too quickly they disappear,
Disinfected by my perfectionist ego…
Not good enough,
Not good enough,
Not good enough.
You will never be good enough.

You are a fool,
A stupid fool,
To think you have anything to say.

Brilliant!
This little person in my mind
That throws out such fabulous words
From the depths of its prison.

It does not fear my ego,
Or get angry at how soon its words are lost,
It just keeps throwing them out,
Like one day I might actually catch them.

Night after night
It is building and rebuilding-
The past, the present, the future,
The unknown
Over and over again,
Hour after hour, night after night.

Chatter, chatter, chatter
It does not stop
It needs to purge itself
I cannot breathe
Binge, purge, binge, purge
Night after night after night.

Not good enough,
Not good enough,
Do it perfectly or not at all…
You are NOT good enough,
Not good enough,
Not good enough.

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